VOLUME #71: January 2001
IMPERIAL
HOLONET


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Tornado Squadron
Report #22
1.12.2001 - COL Kessler

Tornado Squadron
You Love Us Really :)

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GRUDGE MATCH
This week:
Shiny Software's "Messiah"
vs
THE Messiah

With your hosts - Kessler and CoHo

Kessler: Oh man.
CoHo: Hmm...
Kessler: We're going straight to hell.
CoHo: Yep.
Kessler: What if Shiny's Messiah wins?
CoHo: Then I'd rather go to hell. And I'll be real angry, too.
Kessler: Bugger.
CoHo: Hmm...
Kessler: Go Jesus!
CoHo: Jesus rah!!


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New Iron Star System Implemented... sort of.

All previous holders of Iron Stars have had their medals converted to the new Iron Star - Platinum Ribbon, in line with the new changes to the Iron Star/Competition Award system (details at http://www.tiecorps.org/mb/view.asp?b=1&v=0&s=0).

The changes haven't been fully implemented yet, however what has been done is that all previous holders of the Iron Star have been awarded 10 FCHG Points for each Iron Star they hold, adn had their medals converted to Platinum Ribbons. What this means, is that as holder of the most Iron Stars in the Fleet, I've just picked up 30 easy FCHG points!

And they say nothing in this life is free :P

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Dark Lord and Ewok of the Week

No awards this week. It's been too quiet to make it worthwhile. Once the activity picks up (okay, apart from you, Shak) I'll start dishing these out again. Well... okay. Except for Ewok of the Week. Do anything stupid enough and you can always win that ;)


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Battlegroups Ace Squadron Award

BGCOM/VA Jarak is introducing a new feature in the Battlegroup Ace series, the Ace Squadron. A bit like the Ace Pilot, but a lot harder to get and pretty much impossible to keep. It will be determined by a playoff on each ship to find a Ship Champion After that, the Wing X Ace Squadron will be playing against the Immortal's Wing XI Ace Squadron, although quite how the BGCOM expects to get a result from playing a TIE Squadron against an XWA Squadron remains to be seen. The winner from there will fight the winner of the Wing VIII/Wing XI matchup. Overall winner will be the Battlegroup Ace Squadron.

Now, here's my plan. We hold the Tornado Supremacy Tour off until we've won the Ace Squadron Title, then we restart the Supremacy Tour. We then use whatever mission we're flying against the current Supremacy Tour Squadron, as the mission we fly to defend the Ace Squadron Title. That way we can devote full concentration to keeping both titles without having to split our time between multiple contests.

Of course, we have to actually win the Battlegroup Ace Squadron first, but do you really think we can't do it? :P


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Veers Speaks!

Despite being laughed at publicly for insisting it was true, Colonel Kessler can now PROVE that the Leader of Flight Three knows what email is. CPT Veers was so pleased at being promoted, he forgot to include the self-destruct on his weekly emails to the CMDR. Kessler can show you this email to prove that Veers DOES talk every now and then. Or he would be able to if he hadn't deleted it.

They don't call him "That Idiot" Kessler for nothing.


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Quote of the Week
"Don't talk like that, Ric, or I'm gonna rub sandpaper on your genitalia until you cry like a two dollar whore who broke a three dollar nail." - MAJ TopDawg figures out how to speak to GN Ricaud.


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The Usual Suspects

Flight One - The Missile Magnets
Fighter Pilots Make Movies - Bomber Pilots Make History
CMDR-AMB/COL Kyle "Old Man" Kessler
Working with Science Office on the Fleet Manual Project.

FM/MAJ "Snoop-Doggy" TopDawg
--

FM/LC Corran "Damn I'm Gorgeous" Horn
--

FL/LCM Kaedryl "Beer Monster" Di'Mathe
--


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Flight II - The Brylcreem Boys
Kissing Ass and Taking Names
FL/CPT "Mister Empire" Kou-Taiki
--

FM/CPT "Daddy" Shakur
Flew TC-TIE 5
Flew TC-TIE 6
Flew TC-TIE 8
Flew TC-TIE 9
Flew TC-TIE 11
Awarded Palpatine Crescent

FM/CPT "Old Man River" Fishbone
--

FM/CM "Darth Vile" Xyrryc
Flew Free-TIE 125

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Flight III - The High Priests of Love
We're the Love Commandos and this is a Raid!
FL/CM Callum "The Shadow" Veers
Promoted to Captain in reward for his years of faithful service. Veers may not talk much, but you can always depend on him :)

FM/MAJ Aven "Hermann the German" Kronn
--

FM/LCM "Uncle Fester" Jerry
--

FM/LCM Kaoru "Junior" Miki
--

Hmmm... the High Priests of Love seem pretty quiet this week. Let me know you're alive, guys ;)

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Peace, Love, Shave the Wookie.

CMDR-AMB/COL Kyle Kessler/Tornado Squadron/Wing X/ISD Challenge
MoH/IC/OoR/GOE/GSx2/SSx4/BSx9/PCx4/ISMx10/MoI-DC/IS-3PR/LoC-PSx34/CoB/LoAx3/OV-3E [PLDN]
[IWATS][IIC/3][M/2][SM/1][TT][XTT][CBX]][XA-A][GFX]
Battlegroup Command Advisor
http://www.xtc56.dial.pipex.com/deathwind.htm


The contest no-one finds: Name the movie quoted in the activity reports and win a mystery prize from the CMDR's Waste Bin
Last week's answer - "It's just you, me, and Smith and Wesson."
"Dirty Harry" Winner - TopDawg

 

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