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The Day that Darth Kelh Came Back - AD Pickled Yoda
Date 23/10
Odin Squadron Briefing Room
LT Pickled Yoda stepped up and stood before the pilots.
“Greetings, pilots. You are here because CMDR Kelh is coming back from his leave, and he said that he wanted to speak to you all and catch up on the activity. His TIE Interceptor landed 5 minutes ago.”
<Kelh walks in room>
“And here he is!” concluded Yoda. “Welcome back Commander.”
“Thank you Lieutenant. I used my leave well, and am back to whip you pilots into shape. I actually went on a bit of an intergalactic holiday. I met this super bloke called Desaan on Artus Prime. He gave me this green crystal, took me to a secret planet. I don’t remember how I got here, but I do have a surprise for you all. But first, lets hear the squadron report Yoda.”
“Right. This week Leper changed his INPR, Shai worked on fiction and has some missions, I finished my holonet site and flew a battle. TK had a week off with no activity.”
Kelh interrupted him. “Where is JamieK?”
Yoda seemed nervous. “Ahh yeah, about JamieK.”
Kelh’s voice was low and threatening. “Yes?”
“We were on a routine patrol near the boarders of EH territory, where we were sent by our new BGCOM. We ran into a substantial force of pirates and mercenaries. We flew well and were chasing the last ones out of the system when an ion cannon hit JamieK and a tractor beam from the enemy’s last Corvette caught him. They used him as a hostage to force us to let them go. We recovered JamieK, but he was injured quite severely, and we had to send him to the M/FRG Phoenix, for recovery.”
“I see Lieutenant.” Kelh raised his right hand. His computer interface flashed red. The fist closed. “You have failed me for the last time Commander!”
Yoda rose inexplicably into the air. His hands clutched his throat. Struggling for breath he tried to cry out for mercy. The last thing he saw was Kelh being held down by a team of stormtroopers.
Later that week, Yoda woke up in his quarters. Dazed, he sat up and wondered whether it had all been a dream. He then noticed the room’s other occupant, CMDR Kelh. Yoda panicked fro a moment, then realised that any struggle would be futile.
Kelh reassured him that he was not going to kill him. But added “I am very serious about getting the squadron back into top shape. By any means necessary.
<Typical of Imperial engineering, the effects of the force crystal wore off within the week, I still bear the scars, however.>
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