NOTE: BOB THE BUILDER IS A UK CARTOON. It is currently contending with Eminem to get the UK Christmas No. 1. We bring the connection to it's "logical twisted conclusion."
* osangar randomly plays Stan by Eminem
<CPT_Khaen> that song is fscked up, osan
<CPT_Khaen> Eminen has issues
<CPT_Khaen> *eminem
<Ricaud> It's a great song, foo. :P
<Ricaud> The fact he has issues is what makes it such a classic record.
<Werdna_LB> has anyone heard Dido's album (feat. with Eminem in Stan)?
<osangar> it might be Christmas no 1 in the uk
<`Hawkie> or Bob the Builder
<MAJMinkus> Classic it may be. But can it beat the allmighty Bob the Builder for no 1 this week? >:P
<osangar> I don't think so
<`Hawkie> i thin it will
<Ricaud> That would be pretty cool ... the Christmas No. 1 being a song about an obsessive fan who kills himself and his pregnant wife through drink-driving. :P
<CPT_Khaen> bob is a loser
<CPT_Khaen> his only friends are his vehicles
<CPT_Khaen> and that scarecrow thingie
<osangar> no he has a female friend :)
<CPT_Khaen> well i aint never seen her
<`Hawkie> Bob win becuase it Xmas , just face it , its going happen
<`Tom> Bah...You're obssesive about Bob
<MAJMinkus> Ricaud. Yes. It would be amusing. But then again, when have we had a Christmas number 1 that wasn't complete sh*te? >:P
<Ricaud> Point Minkus.
<Ricaud> Are Westlife or somebody like that releasing a bid for Xmas No. 1?
<MAJMinkus> I think Westlife are going to, again.
<Ricaud> For some reason ... I just had a mental image of Hawkie being Bob the Builder's "Stan". :P
* MAJMinkus chuckles.
<`Hawkie> it could happen
<Ricaud> Hawkie drinks a fifth of vodka, and drives himself and his toy trucks over a bridge. :P
<`Tom> lol
<MAJMinkus> lol
* Werdna_LB is writing a bob the builder rap right now...a la Eminem
* `Tom laughs
<Ricaud> Werdna, taking a twisted mental image to its logical conclusion. :P
<`Hawkie> yep
<`Tom> Ooh...Release it in the Christmas Battlecry! :P
<Ricaud> Change the lyrics of "Stan" to suit Hawkie and Bob the Builder. :P
<MAJMinkus> Yes. Why Not. Might make a marked improvement on the current musical selection we have when we open Battlecry >:P
<Werdna_LB> do you not like the music?
<CPT_Khaen> the music rocks, Werd
<`Hawkie> LB put S-Club7 on this month one
<MAJMinkus> 1st one was ok. What the hell was the second one? >:P
* `Tom smacks Horkkee
<Werdna_LB> no, I'm putting Steps on instead :o)
<MAJMinkus> Someone kick him. Hard.
<`Hawkie> that will do :P
<Werdna_LB> it was sugababes actually
<Ricaud> What about Lolly? :P
<MAJMinkus> I refer to my previous statement in the matter >:P
* `Tom throws Hawkie and LB through a wood chipper
<Ricaud> Sugababes ... are they the ones whose videos all look like Gap adverts? :P
<MAJMinkus> Bah. If you want excessively poor music, only one way to go. Chas and Dave >:P
<Ricaud> Dude, don't diss Chas and Dave. :P
<`Tom> I thought you liked Chas and Dave
<Ricaud> Rabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbitrabbit. :P
<`Hawkie> no comment
<Werdna_LB> bloody cockney b*stards
* Werdna_LB is sorry for that statement
* `Tom laughs
* MAJMinkus smacks LB.
<Ricaud> It's okay, nobody here's going to disagree with that statement. :P
<osangar> better to be cockney than geordie though
<`Tom> Geordie's are way better than Cockneys
<`Hawkie> hehe
* MAJMinkus is allowed to diss Chas and Dave >:P
<Werdna_LB> Geordies are everyones 2nd fav people after themselves
<Werdna_LB> hey Bob, I phoned you up last week,
<Werdna_LB> I had a broken wall, and pipes inside that leaked,
<Werdna_LB> you said you fit me in, and fix it within the week,
<Werdna_LB> but you never came around, YOU'RE JUST A F*CKING CREEP!!!
*** trow|bbl has quit IRC
<osangar> hehe
<Werdna_LB> that's all I got so far
<Werdna_LB> now I'm considering if I should record it
<`Tom> Well done, LB :P
<osangar> definately
* osangar would buy it
<`Hawkie> brb
<`Tom> Do it!
<Werdna_LB> mind you...I can't rap for toffee
<Werdna_LB> but I do talk fairly fast
* `Tom chuckles to himself
<Werdna_LB> I also now have the Dido track that Eminem used..so sampling should be easy
<osangar> they used that Dido track in a Dawsons Creek episode
<osangar> more useless info for you all
<Werdna_LB> they use another one for the Roswell high theme
<Werdna_LB> actually, dido is pretty good and I'm sooo getting the album
<osangar> didn't she used to be in Faithless
<Werdna_LB> maybe...dunno
<Werdna_LB> either way, it will be mine...OH YES, it will be mine
<Ricaud> Damn ... when you look at the lyrics for Stan, they really would adapt quite well to Hawkie and his Bob the Builder obsession. :P
<Ricaud> For example ...
<Ricaud> Dear Bob, I wrote but you still ain't callin'
<Ricaud> I left my cell', my pager, and my nursery school phone at the bottom
<Ricaud> I sent two letters back in Autumn, you must notta got 'em
<Ricaud> There probably was a problem at the Post Office or somethin'
<Ricaud> Sometimes my spelling's too sloppy when I'm jottin'
<Ricaud> And so on. :P
<`Hawkie> back
<Werdna_LB> damn, someone has already done a better version than me :(
<Ricaud> Speaking of Hawkie. :P
<Werdna_LB> ...but it's good :o)
<Ricaud> Hrm ... it gets better.
<Ricaud> But anyways, f*** it, what's been up, man, how's your tractor
<Ricaud> My cat's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father
<Werdna_LB> hey Bob, I phoned you up last week,
<Werdna_LB> I had a broken wall, and pipes inside that leaked,
<Werdna_LB> you said you fit me in, and fix it within the week,
<Werdna_LB> but you never came around, YOU'RE JUST A F*CKING CREEP!!!
<Werdna_LB> but, hey I'll calm down, I'll chill, now I'm sound,
<Werdna_LB> it may not be your fault that you can't come around,
<Werdna_LB> you probably got other jobs that you just gotta do,
<Werdna_LB> so for now, I guess, I'll just have to wait for you.
<Werdna_LB> <chorus>
<Werdna_LB> who says I'm crap at English?!?!
<`Hawkie> want a List ?
<Werdna_LB> yes please
<CPTDanMal> ...
<`Tom> Bah...You're supposed to be crap at english to rap
<`Hawkie> dammit
* Werdna_LB is waiting
<CPTDanMal> hush up :P
<`Tom> Rewrite it with spelling mistakes
<`Hawkie> Can i rewrite it please
<Werdna_LB> go ahead, Hawk
* `Hawkie gets to work
<`Tom> Hawkie...The spelling mistake have gotta be things like "wit'" instead of with...Not unreadable :P
<`Hawkie> Tom you're just n fun
<Werdna_LB> yeah, but I'm actually going to rap it, so I'll put in the changes them
<Werdna_LB> *then
<`Hawkie> :)
<`Tom> No, I just want a half decent product at the end that'll make me laugh a bit, Not a page full of unreadable rubbish
Half-wrote, the rap looks like this...
<chorus>
Dear Bob, I got a broken wall,
I need a builder to fix it and you're the one to call.
There's now a massive hole, where the wall should be,
So can you come around my place and estimate the fee?
There's also a leaking pipe, so I hope you have plumbing skill,
or at least have the ability to keep the dripping down until,
you find someone else who can,
like that plumber down the road, you know the the one...I think he's called Stan.
<chorus>
Dear Bob, I phoned you up last week,
I had a broken wall, and pipes inside that leaked,
you said you fit me in, and fix it within the week,
but you never came around, YOU'RE JUST A F*CKING CREEP!!!
but hey I'll calm down, I'll chill and now I'm sound,
it may not be your fault that you can't come around,
you probably got other jobs that you just gotta do,
so for now, I guess, I'll just have to wait for you.
<chorus>
Now I just have to make phone caller go nuts drive off a cliff in a tricycle with Bob's cat...and then a bit with Bob talking about how he doesn't like threats and that he's going to get a big digger and rip off the callers testi....