The Christmas Capers.
"Left a bit, right a bit, left a bit, left, left that’s it hold it hold it O.K… go… now."
Cm Sasquatch just had enough time to roll to his right before the Christmas tree hit the deck of the Psi briefing lounge beside him. Cm Sasquatch’s Thoughts turned to why it was called Christmas. He remembered his brother telling him the story of Anitikus. The young Rebel who was born in an imperial prison cell, and of how he escaped with 12 men at his side and of how he became one of the greatest threats to the Imperium. He could still not see why the Emperor’s Hammer celebrated it to this day.
"O.K lets try this again and lets get it right this time"
It had taken them weeks to get this far with the preparations. Soon and now only 19 days away from the 25th of December, was when the big party was to take place and it had to be right!
One Week Earlier
"Psi Squadron to the briefing lounge, Psi squadron to the briefing lounge" came over the tanoy.
"What is it this time" mumbled LCM Sanj.
They had just returned from a hairy mission after which all of them felt they deserved a break. As they walked into the briefing lounge they were greeted by the three flight leaders who seemed to be in heavy discussion. The minute the pilots walked in the conversation stopped and the flight leaders turn to face them. Most of the Squadron was taking their seats when the three Sub lieutenants ran into the room. SL Inkwolf still had some paint on her hands and the other two were slightly dusty, they had obviously been in the middle of their extra duties when the call had come in.
The commander seemed to ignore this fact and carried on with the briefing.
"O.K I don’t suppose any of you have any idea why you’re here and you must be getting fed up of having so much to do I assure you people that over the next few weeks it isn’t going to get any easier."
A general groan came from the pilots.
"I know we have been involved in a lot recently, but this is different. It involves something you all enjoy! I am now going to let Ford explain."
Ford allowed the commander to sit down before beginning; this gave the pilots eyes sometime to adjust to his brightly colored outfit.
"Right I suppose most of u have heard of the annual celebration of Christmas aboard the sovereign and throughout most of the Emperor’s hammer, well this year Psi Squadron is holding a party in the cantina."
A large cheer went up in the briefing room to this news.
"The only problem with this is the cantina needs decorations and this is going to involve a lot of work for all of us." Said Ford raising his voice of the din in the briefing room so as every body could hear what he was saying.
At this the celebrations began to die down and the pilots began to listen to what ford was saying.
"The first thing that is needed is a tree, it needs to be a tall pine tree about 6 feet high now your first duty will be to inspect the nearby planets in search of one. We will them have to go and retrieve it."
"O.K you heard him from now on I want all pilots clocking as many flying hours as possible trying to find one! You all heard me what’s stopping you, GO ON GET A MOVE ON! I want to see all of the new recruits now." Shouted Sasquatch getting the Psi pilots moving.
As the pilots left the briefing room they all started chattering,
"Party, great" said Lt. Doyle thinking of how much booze there would be.
"But Jon you forget the SL’s have drunk the liqueur cabinet dry!" exclaimed LCM Mord
"This is going to be much of a party is it." Said Rhinok
"The commander must have some idea’s otherwise he wouldn’t have suggested a party in the first place." LCM Spector stated.
"Great the bot will be there, and we can all have a party!" LCM Psyko said beginning to like the idea another famous Psi Party.
Five Minutes Later.
The Pilots were already in their flying gear and most of them were running to their Fighters. LCM Psyko was the first to his cockpit he jumped in closely followed by LT Doyle and LCM Mord. The rest of Psi close behind. Psyko radioed ready for launch, two seconds later he was in Deep space, followed by LT Doyle, Jon could never get used to that he hated the feeling that he was somewhere one minute nowhere the next.
Commander Sasquatch’s voice came over the radio "flight one set coordinates for yanos prime, flight two Ikbar and flight three check out the ikos system! OK. Flights you have your orders I wan the biggest Christmas tree aboard the Sov to go in the Briefing lounge, Engaging hyperspace now!"
Two minutes later flight one was at its hyperspace co-ordinates.
"Prepare to revert to realspace"
The flight exited hyperspace and throttled up to full power.
"OK. We’ll make a quick sweep of the nearby planets, Jon and Rhinok take the Southern Hemisphere and SL proton you’re with me." Sasquatch’s voice came through loud and clear on the comm. system.
LT Doyle and LCM Maul banked and headed for the pole, the planet was a barren place mostly rock and mountains area but the poles had lush vegetation. This was where the flight were headed coming in low over the ground, taking the Tie Advanced to the point were the engines were having trouble keeping the craft flying they approached the forested area.
"This is no good it’s all low level stuff," said Rhinok
"Even if we did find a tree here it wouldn’t fill the briefing room"
"OK. Head for the next planet me and proton haven’t had much better luck either"
Just that moment Ford’s voice was heard over the comm. "multiple bandits closing fast we could do with some help here" With that Ford transmitted their location.
"Everybody clear the planet and enter hyperspace as soon as you can"
Rhinok and Jon were the first with Sasquatch and proton not far behind.
5 Minutes later
Flight one exited hyperspace, Giving them time to survey the scene flight two were engaged with 6 A-wings and a few clicks out closing fast were 12 B-wings accompanied by a 4 man X-wing squad, and more fighters being launched from the nearby planet. "Engaging nearest target" came Rhinoks voice, "OK. I’m on your wing came Jon’s reply.
They both hit the first unsuspecting A-wing with quad cannons ripping away it’s shields and heavily damaging it’s hull, as it pulled up it was met by the fire form Ford’s Tie causing it to fireball.
"I wouldn’t have wanted to be that pilot," said Rhinok, facing Fords wrath you won’t last long.
At that minute one of the B-wing got a lock on LT Doyles fighter,
"We need to engage those B-wings they will make mice meat out of flight two if we are not quick enough."
"Incoming missile" was the warning Jon got from his targeting computer. He targeted it .2 clicks out, the next thing he knew it had knocked out his rear shields and sent his Tie into a spiral. Fighting to regain control he dumped cannon power into his shields and reset them to equal balance.
An A-wing fireballed in front of him, pulling hard up to avoid colliding with the wreak, At that moment he notice flight three had joined the fight.
"That one was on me" cried Inkwolf.
"Thanks I owe you another beer now" laughed Jon
Rhinok targeted the B-wing switching to missiles he fired two in to the shields taking them down to 20%, immediately switched to lasers and began pounding it with quad laser beams. The pilot ejected realizing there was no hope for his tattered ship.
Red laser beams impacted with his rear shields and he pulled up taking avasive maneuvers. The next minute four missiles hit the B-wing causing it to explode.
Ford meanwhile still in the thick of things pulled out of a steep climb and leveled off snatching a few cannon shots at the X-wing, the final hit taking down it’s shields and damaging the flight controls. Ford banked right to avoid the lasers raining down his left side.
Psi Squadron wasn’t fairing to badly they had knocked out most of the rebel star fighters, SL Sidan had lost most of his shields but had managed to retreat slightly to allow them to recharge enough for him to engage once again. SL Proton was it the worst state out of all of the pilots his shield final gave way to the rebel fire, He dumped all his cannon power to shields and transferred laser power to engines giving him far more speed than the following B-wings. At that moment CPT Darkstar launched two missiles in to one of them and engaged the other with dual lasers, switching to Ions when the charge was running low, Disabling the rebel starfighter.
With only 4 B-wing and 2 x- wing remaining the Psi veterans were beginning to enjoy themselves. Psyko was finishing off the two X-wing that were harrying Mord and darkspector was helping Sanj with the remaining B-wings.
"What happened Ford?" asked Sasquatch
"We were just beginning our sweep of the third planet of this system, Mord had pointed out that it looked like a good place for a large tree, when we were engaged by 3 X-wings that seemed to come out of nowhere. Two minutes later they were joined by 4 headhunters and 6 T-wings, so we retreated from the planet taking out the fighters as we went when the A-wings dropped out of hyperspace just ahead of us. The rest you know!"
"OK. I want a closer look at that planet, ammunitions check."
"I have two missiles left," said ford
"Three for me" Mord said
"I still have the full eight," said Jon
"Four over here" Rhinok replied
"Inkwolf here, only got 4"
"I’m all out," said Sidan
"Six for Sanj"
"Two" said Darkstar
"I’m afraid I’ve only got one," said Psyko
"I’m all out as well," said proton
"Three" said dark spector
"OK be ready for anything we are going down to that planet and the rebels have something to hide otherwise they wouldn’t have attacked flight two. This is how we are going to do it Flight one are going down to the planets surface to scan for anything unusual and flight three are to stay in the planets atmosphere to deal with any craft launched from the planet. Flight two I want you to cover flight three stay in a low orbit and intercept any incoming fighters."
"Shouldn’t we call for reinforcement" asked Proton
"What and let them spoil all of our fun" cried Psyko
"I want to find out what’s down there before calling for help it might be nothing but its worth checking just in case." Replied Sasquatch, I’m going to Drop an imperial beacon and get the sovereign here to pick up the rebel pilots so as they can be interrogated.
The Squad fanned out and approached the planet, Flight one going close in and using the scanners across the planet surface looking for anything out of the ordinary.
"I’ve got something," cried proton
Proton headed for the rocky mountain that was in this area of the slightly frozen forest below them.
"Proton don’t leave the flight," cried Sasquatch too late.
That instant a missile was launched from the surface, Proton banked but the missile raked the underside of his Tie
"My engines …… I’m going to ……. Down, otherwise ……… to crash" was all that was heard through the static.
"I want a closer look at that mountain, as there must be something to hide if there is a surface warhead launcher. We won’t make the same mistake as SL Proton we’ll approach it from the other side. I hope he’s all right down there."
Flight one circled the emplacement, and began scanning the rock face for the other side. As they began their scanner sweeps of the area, two bulk doors opened and 4X-wings and 8 Z-95 headhunters were launched
"It’s our day today, more fighters" cried Lt. Doyle
"Flight 3 I want u to bombard those hanger doors with whatever you’ve got" Sasquatch said over the comm.
"I think we’ve got ourselves a little nest of rebels." Exclaimed Rhinok.
{
"What mind that guys crazier than Murdock" was the next thing Psi Squadron heard over the comm.
"Where the hell did that come from"
"You tread on my foot again and I’ll rap that gun round you’re face"
"What the hell is goin’ on here?" Lt. Doyle cried who’s jamming the comm.
Next thing that was played through the comm. was a tune that sounded strangely compelling to the pilots
(A-team theme tune plays in the background)
"I like this music" cried Mord turn it up and Lets go kick some rebel ass!
}
At that moment missile after missile pounded on the hanger doors. Flight one engaged the fighters
Head on the tie advanceds met the Headhunters, 4 of their no instantly vaporized by the hail of laser energy poured in the old ships. The others broke formation and began to flee. The whole of flight turned their attention towards the X-wings. They were proving to be a lot harder,
"Four against three these aren’t fair odds I like it at least 4 to one" cried Sasquatch as the fight in front of him exploded.
"I’ve been lock onto," cried Rhinok
"Dodge, missile," cried proton as he engaged the Z-95 with the lock on Rhinok, the quad lasers pounding the craft until it exploded.
Rhinok banked at the last second and watched the missile fly right by him targeting it, his targeting box turned green and he snatch a couple of bursts into the missile and it exploded.
The last of the fighter taken care of the pilots began searching the planet for a suitable Christmas tree.
"This is the SSSD Sovereign Psi squadron report in!" WC Gallows voice came sharply through the comm.
"CMDR Sasquatch reporting in, we have seemed to come across a rebel base on the third planet in this system, we have dealt with any starfighter threat for the moment. It would probable be a good idea to send in the stormtroopers."
"OK we read you loud a clear Sasquatch. You can return to the hanger now."
Sasquatch turned to the squad frequency I want all pilots planet side looking for a large Christmas tree this place looks like it could have what we are looking for.
A couple of hour’s later back at the Sovereign in the Psi Briefing room
"OK so we’ve found the Christmas tree, the next priority is the Booze, since the SL’s have cleared out the liquor cabinet we will need to round up some supplies. There is according to Intel a rebel supply station in the nearby area I’ve Talked to WC Gallows and he has allowed us to go for a resupplie run to commandeer some of their supplies and destroy what we cannot bring with us. OK for now you can have some rest, it wont be for at least a week in the meantime we’ll have to plan how we are going to get the Christmas tree aboard the sov."
A week later Psi squadron was sitting in the briefing room after returning from a successful raid on the rebel supply convoy.
"OK we have got enough booze and food for the party, now we have too get the Christmas tree on board the sov."
"I have an idea Sir" piped the now chirpy SL Inkwolf we could get one of the Transport pilots that we’ve just flow with drunk on some of the booze, and steal his transport and fetch the tree in that.
"An excellent Idea" said CPT Darkstar lets get started straight away.
A couple of hour’s later Psi squadron with their newly acquired transport were on the planet surface.
Lt. Spector and LCM sanj were hacking away at the base of a six-foot high conifer tree, while the rest of the squadron were standing guard.
Two minutes later the tree came crashing to the floor.
"OK people lets get it into the transport, there’s not going to be much room in the transport but you’ll have to put up with the inconvenience for the short period before we get back to the sov."
Back at the SSSD Sov
After the short journey back to the sov, most of the squadron looked a mess burs In their hair and over their uniforms, they were running through the corridors carrying a mighty six foot fern in to the briefing room.
WC Gallows turn the corridor to see the end of a tree turn at the end of the corridor, must get some more sleep thought gallows I’m seeing trees running through the corridors now!
FA Kramer was watch the goings on through his network of cameras that were set up at the end of every corridor, now what exactly are Psi Squadron up to now, it can be any good, running through the corridor’s with a tree! I’ll have to get briefing room 22 active again. With that he began chuckling to himself.
Back in their briefing room Psi Squadron began trying to put the tree in to a pot in the corner of the room, "Left a bit….. right a bit…… hold it steady."
Finally when they had got the tree steady and straight in it pot, the all sat around the briefing room, "Now all there is to wait until the party!!!" Cried Psyko and we can get some rest.
"I have a question" said SL Sidan why are we celebrating Christmas, I’ve been reading the Data banks and it says it’s something to do with a rebel named Anitikus but it doesn’t have anything to do with the EH?
"Ahh we celebrate Christmas because it is the celebration of his capture by the EH" Said CPT Darkstar.